We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
