Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Randomize
