I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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