He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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