how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
