Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
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