Say something about gay babies.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
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