is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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