Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
