we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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