Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
