I CAN MOONWALK!
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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