i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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