And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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