I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
