hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
