I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
