just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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