No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
