I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize
