then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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