I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
