We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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