Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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