I'd wear matching sweaters with you
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
