Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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