I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
