Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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