Porn is love you can see.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
