let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
