we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
