I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
