I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
as a side note pls kill me
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
