im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize
