i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize