It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
