Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
