That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize