This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
