I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
