Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
