do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
My pussy is not your playground.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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