16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
