I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
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