I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
