we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
