He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
did you just send me my own nude
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
