I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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