i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
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