We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
